Tuesday, June 23, 2009

One month later

Well I have been back now for a month and I think the adjustment period is over. I heard it would be hard coming back but I didn't think it would this hard. For the first three weeks I would lay in bed till 7 a.m. wide awake because my internal clock was all messed up. I would then sleep in till 2 or 3 p.m. This was brutal and I am glad that I've returned to a somewhat normal schedule. I have still been struggling with my insomnia but it seems to be getting better the last week. 

The past month I have been so bored. I graduated on the 13th and now I am struggling to find something to occupy my time with till school starts again in September. I have been in school for so long that I don't know what to do when I am not. Unfortunately, reading is not an option. Being a history major requires so much reading and writing so anytime I get a break the last thing I want to do is read or write. I was so surprised at myself for keeping this blog going the whole time I was in Japan. I intend to try and keep it going but lately I just have been so lazy. I just need to do it everyday because it will give me something to do. But when it comes to reading, I feel like leisurely reading has been ruined for me because of school. Maybe I'll give it another shot.

I think one of the hardest things about returning back to my normal life is it's not often that you leave your life temporarily knowing that you will have to go start over somewhere else. Usually when we leave it's for a vacation or because we moved. It was really weird leaving and starting this somewhat new life knowing that it was temporary. It took me so long to get adjusted in Japan and then when I finally did, it was time to go home. It's so hard to explain how it feels but it's kind of a mind fuck. I keep thinking I see people here that I know but then realize that that person lives in Japan and not Portland. I also wake up in the middle of the night panic stricken because I thought coming home was a dream and I was still in Japan. I jump up and turn on the lights and breath a sigh of relief. 

My experience in Japan was hard but I think it helped me grow as a person and made me a better student. I would do it again and plan on returning someday, maybe to teach for a semester. I'm so glad to be home though. There are so many things that I like and dislike about this country and the same goes with Japan. One thing I realized though is that every country has issues and no one is better than the other. There are a lot of things we could learn from other countries and their cultures because they do some things better than us. And vice versa. Either way I am glad I live here, not just in Portland but in the United States. No country is perfect or ideal but you just have to be thankful for what you have and fight for what you want.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Another Flying Adventure.

     Sorry I haven't posted since I left the island. I want to keep this thing going now that I am home, it may not be as interesting but I need something to fill my time with.
Leaving Japan wasn't hard. I was sad when I said goodbye, shed some tears but mostly felt anxious to get on that big ass plane for the 9 1/2 hour trek across the Pacific and return to 'normal' life. 
     I've ranted about my fear of flying so I won't go off on another tangent however I will say there is no such thing as a good flight, at least for me. There is either: unbearable, horrendous, I almost died, fuck this I am never doing this again ever or just okay. My friend Izzy was my flying partner, who is just as scared of flying as me, if not even more. She has gone to fear of flying therapy and takes strong pills to help her relax. I take anxiety pills when I fly but after seeing what Izzy's pills do to her I realize I am taking the wrong ones. Hers work mine kinda work.
     When we left Japan swine flu was wreaking havoc on the already paranoid and overly cautious island. So when Izzy asked one of the flight attendants for something for her upset stomach, which was causing her to vomit, I knew by looking at the flight attendants face that Izzy had just unintentionally started a swine flu hysteria on our flight. It didn't help that an hour before this I asked for some type of headache relief. The fact of the matter was that the night before we all stayed up late drinking beer in the park. We barely slept so of course we were a tad bit hangover, some more than others. 
     Combine this with the fear of flying, eating shitty food in the airport, taking pills to calm your nerves, breathing recycled crappy air that makes your already dehydrated ass even more dehydrated and with the anxiety of returning home after being gone so long=one headache and one upset stomach. I tried explaining this to three or four flight attendants that came to check on us but you could tell none of them believed me and thought we both had swine flu. 
     I told Izzy to let me do the talking from here on out and if they asked, she was feeling better. We were not going to tell them how our finals were cancelled because of swine flu. I knew we didn't have it because no one in our city had been infected. I told the attendants this but it didn't help that Izzy had made at least a dozen trips to the bathroom at this point but I told them she only puked one of those times. Then one of them came over and told us that if Izzy wasn't feeling better by the end of the flight, he would have to contact the San Francisco airport and let them know we might be infected and that he had already notified the captain. Quarantine seemed inevitable. 
     In Japan they were quarantining people for 10 days and once I thought about this I started to freak out. I told Izzy she needed to just go to sleep and act like she feels better any time an attendant approached us. I had been in Japan for four months, she had been there for nine, there was no way in hell we were going to make it all the way home and then be stuck in San Fran in quarantine for 10 days. 
     For the rest of the flight, the attendants were extra careful and made sure they had no contact with us when serving us our crap food and drinks. At one point I asked one of them for a pen to fill out my customs sheet and when I was done I got up to return it to her. She looked horrified that I had even left my seat and refused to take the pen back saying I could keep it as a souvenir. This would have been a nice gesture but the pen was from a Hyatt hotel not from United Airlines so why the hell would I want a pen from Hyatt? I told her I didn't want it but she just insisted I take, refusing to take it back. 
     As we made our descent into San Francisco I envisioned health workers in hazmat suits awaiting Izzy and I. I had already planned an escape route and Izzy informed me she would not be joining me. As they came through the cabin for the last time to collect remaining trash several of them stopped by to ask how we were doing. I cut Izzy off and replied that we were doing great and that we just get a little nervous when we fly. They seemed to buy it because Izzy and I were scott free once we exited the aircraft. It was a tortuous flight as always but made especially worse by the stupid swine flu hysteria. I was forced to sit there the whole flight while Izzy was either puking or sleeping, thinking of different escape plans and various ways to convince them that we weren't infected with the flu. I guess one good thing came out of it though, I barely thought about crashing into the ocean or blowing up mid-air. I was too worried about the pigs.