One month later

Well I have been back now for a month and I think the adjustment period is over. I heard it would be hard coming back but I didn't think it would this hard. For the first three weeks I would lay in bed till 7 a.m. wide awake because my internal clock was all messed up. I would then sleep in till 2 or 3 p.m. This was brutal and I am glad that I've returned to a somewhat normal schedule. I have still been struggling with my insomnia but it seems to be getting better the last week. 

The past month I have been so bored. I graduated on the 13th and now I am struggling to find something to occupy my time with till school starts again in September. I have been in school for so long that I don't know what to do when I am not. Unfortunately, reading is not an option. Being a history major requires so much reading and writing so anytime I get a break the last thing I want to do is read or write. I was so surprised at myself for keeping this blog going the whole time I was in Japan. I intend to try and keep it going but lately I just have been so lazy. I just need to do it everyday because it will give me something to do. But when it comes to reading, I feel like leisurely reading has been ruined for me because of school. Maybe I'll give it another shot.

I think one of the hardest things about returning back to my normal life is it's not often that you leave your life temporarily knowing that you will have to go start over somewhere else. Usually when we leave it's for a vacation or because we moved. It was really weird leaving and starting this somewhat new life knowing that it was temporary. It took me so long to get adjusted in Japan and then when I finally did, it was time to go home. It's so hard to explain how it feels but it's kind of a mind fuck. I keep thinking I see people here that I know but then realize that that person lives in Japan and not Portland. I also wake up in the middle of the night panic stricken because I thought coming home was a dream and I was still in Japan. I jump up and turn on the lights and breath a sigh of relief. 

My experience in Japan was hard but I think it helped me grow as a person and made me a better student. I would do it again and plan on returning someday, maybe to teach for a semester. I'm so glad to be home though. There are so many things that I like and dislike about this country and the same goes with Japan. One thing I realized though is that every country has issues and no one is better than the other. There are a lot of things we could learn from other countries and their cultures because they do some things better than us. And vice versa. Either way I am glad I live here, not just in Portland but in the United States. No country is perfect or ideal but you just have to be thankful for what you have and fight for what you want.