Don't fear the reaper, it's just the Ambien.

For those of you who don't already know this, I suffer from chronic insomnia and have since I was pretty young. I have tried everything but have never been able to alleviate my suffering. I have always refused meds because I didn't want to become dependent on a pill in order to sleep. About six months ago, I decided that maybe I would just get some type of sleep aid from my doctor just to see how it worked. He prescribed me trazedone, which is usually used to treat depression. It made me feel drugged out, a feeling I absolutely hate, but didn't help me sleep any better. Right before I came to Japan I mentioned that the trazedone was a failure to my doctor and he prescribed me Ambien. 

 I remember the commercials but couldn't remember much about it. As I was waiting for my prescription to be filled the pharmacists came over and told me she needed my ID and then needed me to sign some form for the pills. I just stood there looking at her with a confused look on my face. I've never had to give my ID or sign a waiver for a prescription before. She looked annoyed so I caved in and walked out of there with a bottle full of pills, actually more like a bag full of pills but that's another story.

 They slipped in a sheet in my bag with a bunch of information and warnings about Ambien. After reading them with my mouth open, I decided that the chances of me ever trying them were minimal but I threw them in my suitcase just in case. Here is what was on the piece of paper. 

“Some people using this medicine have engaged in activity such as driving, eating, or making phone calls and later having no memory of the activity. If this happens to you, stop taking Ambien and talk with your doctor about another treatment for your sleep disorder.

Ambien can cause side effects that may impair your thinking or reactions. You may still feel sleepy the morning after taking the medication. Until you know how this medication will affect you during waking hours, be careful if you drive, operate machinery, pilot an airplane, or do anything that requires you to be awake and alert. Do not drink alcohol while you are taking this medication. It can increase some of the side effects of Ambien, including drowsiness. This medication may be habit-forming and should be used only by the person it was prescribed for.”

 They lost me at not remembering driving while I am asleep. I know that the drug company has to warn you of all possible scenarios so no one can sue their ass and in fact the % of people who actually experience these side affects is  low. I get it but it scared the shit out of me. So since I have been in Japan I haven’t touched them. That is until last week. As I mentioned before the painkillers here are like Ibuprofen. I was in so much pain that I couldn’t sleep so one night I caved and popped an Ambien. It was the best night of sleep of my life.

 The next night I was plagued with the same dilemma so I took another Ambien. Same results. However, when I woke up during the night the grim reaper was standing at the end of my futon. I swear I was fully awake too. I slapped my face a few times, turned away and looked again and he was still standing there. I must say he’s much shorter in person. I turned and faced the wall falling into a deep slumber. The next day I awoke really groggy and I realized it was because I slept 13 hours. I know when you’re body is hurt, it likes to sleep a lot so that you can heal but I couldn’t help but think the Ambien played a role in it. I thought about the grim reaper all day and even questioned my sanity a few times but brushed it off as an isolated incident.

 That night I popped another one and awoke in the middle of the night to the grim reaper again. I was like, “Look dude, it’s just my ankle. I’m not going over a stupid reason like that.” He just stood there and motioned for me to follow him but I respectively declined and went back to sleep. The next morning I was so freaked out about seeing this dude twice. I was thinking that maybe it was my time because why else would he keep showing up? I was awake both times and he was really standing there. I went to school very troubled. Later I looked up Ambien on the web and was quickly reassured that I am not going on a one-way trip with the reaper and that I was not crazy. One of the side affects is hallucinations. I was so relieved.  I haven’t taken a pill since. My ankle hurts like hell and I haven’t been sleeping again. Obviously, it’s 2:35 in the morning and I am writing a blog about the grim reaper. I’m sure Ambien does wonders for some but I’ll stick to my restless nights because I don’t ever want to see the reaper again.