Say Cheese!

My mind gets a work out here daily. It's beyond the frustration in my language courses and the stimulation from my history classes. It's things I observe daily that I can't really describe to you with words. It's a different world here. Different culture. Different language. Different ideals. Different customs. Different different different, everything is different. I need to write more often as I see things so that they don't become just another stored memory in my head which is full of memories that aren't always shared with everyone. I have traveled a lot in my 29 years and I hardly have any photos of any of my adventures. Sierra, who is a photo taking maniac, even before she had a kid, has always gave me shit about that. She never understood how I could see the world but not document it with a photo. I always argued that I documented it in head--I have the worlds best memory and it's not just visually. The way I always looked at it was those images and memories are forever cemented in my head and if anyone is curious to see what other parts of the world looks like then maybe they should see it for themselves. I am not being a jerk but I want all my friends to see the world. I have never had the desire to take a photo just to show them what it looked like because, for one I suck at taking pictures and secondly, pictures don't always do the things you see justice. So I always stood my ground--no photos. Upon finding out I was accepted to this program, Sierra wasted no time telling me I better take pictures. I finally caved because I figured being here for 4 months is a long time and maybe I should stop being so strict with my no picture policy. Sierra was quite pleased. I purchased, what I thought was a good digital camera(it sucks), before I left promising that I would take loads of pictures. I think I am doing pretty good so far. I don't leave my house without my camera and always see things I want to show people back home. But I am constantly let down by my photo taking abilities. Sierra was always the one to document our adventures together and with friends, I'm used to her doing the dirty work cos she's good at it. I have a box of photos from the past 15 years and Sierra has pretty much taken all of them. Every time I come visit her she busts out 2 or 3 photo albums that she's compiled since the last time I saw her. I have given her shit about this forever. I always told her she was going to be one of those moms who has whole walls filled with pictures of her kids. She will fulfill that prophecy I guarantee it. But I love that about her. When I moved to Portland  I, in some sense, lost my personal photographer but met another photo whore, Kristin. So I became dependent on her to document our crazy dance parties and out of control antics. She has an eye for things. She can capture the right moment in the middle of chaos or find the perfect light and make a trash can look beautiful. I always admired that about her because I straight up suck at taking pictures. Since I have been here I always think about Sierra and Kristin's photo capabilities and I try and learn from them but still seem to fail. I think maybe that's why I have never taken photos. I want to remember things as I saw them and a lot times by taking a crap ass photo, it sort of takes something away from me. But alas, I will continue to capture Japan in any way I can even if it means taking out of focus, crappy pictures because maybe you guys can get a glimpse into this different world I live in. In some weird way, taking pictures and posting them for you all to see waters down the loneliness that I feel here because in some way it makes me feel connected to the things and people I miss the most.